Working with adults using violence

Whist being in this field for 20 years now for the past nine years I have been working in specialists Domestic Family Violence Roles working specifically with adults who use violence in their relationships. With hundreds of hours of Mens Behaviour change group facilitation experience and additional one on one work I also provide one on one counselling support to adults using violence. This work is strongly grounded in shame tolerance skills, accountability, safety, and evidence-informed practice. I support clients to understand patterns of harmful behavior and to consider taking responsibility for their actions, and develop skills for healthier deeper connected relationships.

What is Domestic abuse?

  • Emotional or psychological abuse: threats, humiliation, gaslighting, intimidation, or persistent criticism

  • Verbal abuse: yelling, name-calling, insults, or degrading language

  • Forced or controlled substance abuse: controlling your access to drugs, mixing a persons drugs with drugs they do not consent to. Using drugs to drug and rape or sex traffic or to maintain control and isolation.

  • Coercive control: isolating someone, monitoring movements, or controlling daily activities

  • Sexual abuse: any sexual activity without consent, pressure, or coercion

  • Financial abuse: controlling access to money, preventing employment, or creating financial dependence

  • Physical abuse: hitting, pushing, choking, restraining, or damaging property to intimidate

  • Digital abuse: monitoring phones, tracking location, or using technology to harass or control, rooting your phone

  • Spiritual or religious abuse: using beliefs, faith, or religious authority to shame, threaten, control, or justify harm

  • Partner visa or immigration abuse: using visa status, sponsorship, or threats of deportation to control or intimidate a partner

  • LGBTQIA+

    Domestic abuse in LGBTQIA+ relationships can include all forms of abuse and may also involve tactics that target sexual orientation, gender identity, or community connection. This can include threats of outing, identity-based abuse, intentional misgendering or deadnaming, isolation from LGBTQIA+ community or chosen family, interference with gender-affirming healthcare, HIV-related coercion or threats, and the use of discrimination, legal systems, or visa status to exert control. Abuse in LGBTQIA+ relationships is serious and often overlooked, but it has real and lasting impacts.